Noticed the recent improvement in McDonald’s advertising? Credit (in
part, at least) must go to Ronald’s right-hand man, vice-president and
chief marketing officer for the past two years, John Hawkes. Although he
put in early marketing stints with Rio Tinto Zinc and Cross Paperware,
Hawkes has been with McDonald’s since the average Brit thought
beefburgers were an exotic foreign food. Now, 14 years on, there is
barely a high street in the land which does not sport the instantly-
recognisable Golden Arches. As today’s castaway, Hawkes arrives on the
Mix island to find his own choice of five objects and one book, as well
as the customary Bible, subscription to Marketing and solar-powered
* To read: Bluff Your Way Round The Internet.
* A photo of McManaman scoring the winning goal against Manchester
United in the Cup Final. Any Cup Final, any time. I don’t come from
Liverpool but I’ve supported them for about 100 years.
* An endless supply of CDs I’ve never heard of, to remind me of my two
* A guitar. Ever since my student days in a band, I’ve wanted to develop
my song-writing skills and this would be a great opportunity to sing
without offending anyone.
* An endless supply of golf balls (plus a sand wedge).
* Last but definitely not least, a small but fully functioning
McDonald’s restaurant. There’s always one close by normally and it would
be an oasis on my island. It would be air-conditioned, its freezer would
be fully stocked with cold drinks, there would be an endless supply of
food and, of course, clean toilets. And the Golden Arches would be a
beacon for potential rescuers.